What next for tech’s top leaders?
You’ve heard of Fantasy Football Manager? Instead of football players, we’ve had a bit of fun with tech leaders by suggesting what they could do when they retire.

According to sources, okay Wikipedia, Salesforce.com's Marc Benioff regularly meditates and practices yoga. This laid back attitude, passion for Sun Tzu's the Art of War, and bear-like stature means that we think he can do just about anything that he wants.
However, given that he could pass for 'straight to video' legend Steven Seagal (from the back anyway), perhaps he should consider starring in eco-kung-fu movies. After all, the world will always need more of those.
Steve Ballmer
Steve Ballmer seems best placed to be a jumping, grape crushing, monkey whooping, compere when he leaves Microsoft. But we knew that already.
He needs to use these skills in a role where he will be really appreciated, and we recommend a monkey house at the zoo. Possibly one with quite an intensive breeding programme.
If the sight of Ballmer leaping about doesn't inspire the alpha males to show their own mettle, we don't know what will. We'd just offer him this advice: Get out of the cage as soon as the action starts, Steve. No one wants to see that.
Oh, there's just one more thing. Of course, we'll miss you all, but we're a bit short this week, so we'll put some cash in the card next time it comes round
Get the ITPro daily newsletter
Sign up today and you will receive a free copy of our Future Focus 2025 report - the leading guidance on AI, cybersecurity and other IT challenges as per 700+ senior executives
-
M&S suspends online sales as 'cyber incident' continues
News Marks & Spencer (M&S) has informed customers that all online and app sales have been suspended as the high street retailer battles a ‘cyber incident’.
By Ross Kelly
-
Manners cost nothing, unless you’re using ChatGPT
Opinion Polite users are costing OpenAI millions of dollars each year – but Ps and Qs are a small dent in what ChatGPT could cost the planet
By Ross Kelly
-
SAP's new product sustainability tracker helps keep your carbon footprint in check
News New solution monitors products' environmental impact from conception to disposal
By Praharsha Anand
-
Week in review: Goodbye Mr Jobs; iPhone moaning; mobile buyouts
News It's been a week of highs and lows as Apple announces the iPhone 4S, only to be followed by the sad news of the death of Steve Jobs.
By Alan Lu
-
Steve Jobs dies aged 56
News The Apple co-founder dies at the age of 56 as the tributes to the great man flood in from across the globe.
By Tom Brewster
-
From zero to hero: The second reign of Steve Jobs
News As Steve Jobs steps down as CEO of Apple, we take a look back at his 15 year tenure as he transformed his company and the wider industry with it.
By Alan Lu
-
Five ways Cook can keep Apple king
News Steve Jobs has stepped down as CEO, so how can Tim Cook keep the beast that is Apple moving onwards and upwards?
By Tom Brewster
-
Steve Jobs proposes Apple 'spaceship' HQ
News Apple's new headquarters will look “a little like a spaceship landed,” Steve Jobs says.
By Tom Brewster
-
Apple iOS 5 launched with over 200 new features
News iOS 5 is uncloaked at WWDC with a host of new features for iPad and iPhone users to enjoy.
By Tom Brewster
-
Oracle brings BI to iPad and iPhone
News Larry Ellison's firm looks to bring business intelligence to agile companies through iPad and iPhone support.
By Tom Brewster